It was awful.

My parents leaving, that is. I still can't believe it - I kept thinking something else was going to cause another extension.
We picked my parents up at Safeway, where they were saying some tearful goodbyes and then we headed off to the ferry. We took the children out of school for the day. On the ferry we spoke. We sat quietly. We took photographs of each other, all of us together. We made jokes. My dad asked Eric to take care of a few last minute details.
When we got back to the car from the passenger deck, somehow, for some reason, the back door of the van slid right off it's hinges when Jethro opened it.
It really wasn't funny at all, but for some reason the whole situation had my mother and I laughing hysterically, tears rolling down our faces, holding our stomachs and clenching our legs!
The fact that we all had to run back upstairs and walk off the ferry, while Eric drove off with Jethro holding the door in place in the back seat just seemed like something so random to happen on such a day.
It's my mother's fault. Really. Whenever a situation is stressful, or something beyond her control, her built-in-leave-reality-behind-laughter kicks in. Ask my dad: He breaks his toe falling off a ladder. Does my mother offer sympathy? Well, yes: inbetween loud guffaws of laughter. Does she suggest medical attention? You bet: As soon as she is able to catch her breath. Does she run for ice? Duh!: If she hasn't wet her pants!
So, my mother laughing at the situation sets me off laughing and pretty soon Katy and Alicia (Jethro's girlfriend) join in. Dad shakes his head at us, Eric does his best to ignore us, Timothy walks away hoping people will not know we are all somehow related, and Jethro reminds us that we are making it worse.
After about 45 minutes my clever husband gets the car fixed and we head off to collect my parent's passports. To avoid overloading in the van we decide to split up and meet at the airport. I offer to ride the bus with Jethro and Alicia, everyone else goes to the homeland security office.
On the bus ride - longer than I thought it would be - Jethro falls asleep and Alicia and I squish as close together as possible. The man behind me to my left is breathing thick, alcohol stenched breath into the air, the one across from us is cursing at his cell-phone and the girl on the other side of us is singing loudly along to the music on her ipod: "Slow motion for meh, slow motion for meh."

Once we arrived we waited a while outside British Airways until the other half arrived. They had taken awhile because the person at Homeland Security couldn't find their passports right away! (And they really wanted to deport them!?!) Anyway, my parent's checked in. A few friends were there, and we all went to find a place to sit and have a meal together. No can do! It is impossible to have a hot meal together because all the restaurants are in the security closed areas. We eventually settled for sandwiches, soda and coffee to avoid having my parents go in, buy everything and come out again which would have taken at least 45 minutes to an hour.
After sitting and talking and eating, it was time to go. It was so hard. Lots of crying and holding. We watched them right until the end. Katy cried so hard. Brogan didn't want to give hugs and kisses, he was just so sad. He did eventually. As they were removing shoes and putting bags through the security screen, I felt that childish urge to scream out "Bye Mom, Bye Dad," just as I used to in the mornings when they left for work when I was a child. I was too choked to get the words out, instead we all just waved and blew kisses.They were supposed to meet up with a deportation officer once they were through the security. They went where they were told, but there was no-one there to meet them! We couldn't believe the INS had spent so much money to make sure my parent's were not granted asylum, and then there was not even one person there to make sure their money was well-spent! Impossible to believe!
They called the next day to say they had arrived safely. They were tired and we all cried again on the phone. The next day Eric and I went to clean out their last few things and the trailer in which their good friends had allowed them to stay.
We've spoken on the phone a few times since and although they are comfortable, they are missing us and the life they had here.
I'll give more news later.

How to say Goodbye?

Almost seven years ago, our family was in an excited frenzy. We had been living in the United States for a year and a half and my parents were coming to join us the next day.
Our children had cleaned and tidied their bedrooms. Our whole house had been put into perfect order. The bathroom sparkled and smelled like summer lavender from the farm near Frog Rock.
I had spent the whole previous week picking up Brogan and carrying him with me as much as possible. He had almost started walking, and I had convinced myself that if I carried him he wouldn't learn how to walk! I wanted to keep him as much a "baby" as possible, until his Pappa and Grandma arrived. He was 10 months old and they hadn't yet seen him in person.
I had cooked a light vegetable soup for dinner the next night, in case they were too tired to eat something big. Eric wondered why I hadn't done too much shopping. I told him, that as soon as my mom was up to it, I wanted to take her to the Safeway on the island and show her the "American grocery store', with all the "American groceries" and to meet the "American people". He laughed indulgently about that.
That night Eric and I went to bed late, we could hardly sleep with excitement. He had been very instrumental in persuading my parents to join us here and he loved them like his own.
We got up early the next day. All the boys wore their best shirts and pants and Katy had slept with a zillion braids in her hair. We let them out and then tied the sides with tiny ribbons. "Grandma is going to be so surprised at how long my hair has gotten, Mama."
Then off we went to the airport to collect our precious family. When we saw my dad - tall above the crowd, and my mom in her turquoise suit next to him, Eric and I had tears on our cheeks. Timothy and Jethro, "There they are." Katy, "Pappa, Pappa!" And my dad, reaching toward Eric to take Brogan, his "new" grandson. Brogan didn't cry. He wasn't scared of this person he did not yet know. He looked at him, looked at me and then touched his Pappa's chin and smiled. "See, he knows me. He doesn't need anyone to tell him who I am, he just knows I'm his family, that I'm his Grandpa. Carol, look at how smart this child is!" And my mother pulled herself out of our embrace and went to see Brogan bonding with my dad.
On the way home at the ferry terminal, we introduced them to Starbucks - coffee like they could not believe existed. They did not know how to choose. Eventually, Eric chose for my dad, a grande decaf, hot, Irish cream latte - to become his forever favorite. My mom and I going for flavors that always define us - caramel and butterscotch.
And then home. Unpack, gifts, hot soup and bread. Exuberance, excitement, happiness, possibilities. A short trip around the community and into Safeway for some needed items - and an introduction to the most amazing people.
Later that evening, we all watched Brogan walking around, it was okay because he could grow and get big now, "cause Pappa and Grandma were here!
I don't know how to say goodbye tomorrow. We don't know yet if we will join them later, or if they will one day come back. But in the meantime, I don't know who will feel it worse. Them. Me. My kids. I'm trying really hard to prepare myself, but I'm just not doing a fine job.
I'll fill you in later.

What a day it's going to be!

Ever wake up and just know - I mean really JUST KNOW that you should forget about any perfect plans you had for the day (like finishing a quilt for my mom and dad)?

Mine started in the dark, early hours this morning - somewhere around 3:00 am if my memory serves. My CPAP machine woke me up with a burning in my nose. I took it off and tried to go back to sleep, but of course, when you know you have to get up in a few hours - and plus I don't sleep well anyway (hence the CPAP - which I will explain in another post) it's really hard to get back to soft, fuzzy dreams.
I did manage to doze until it was time to get lunches and breakfast organized, and then Jethro came to tell Eric and I the bombshell for the day.

"The basements flooded."
"What do mean?"
"It's flooded, there's water all over the floor." (Imagine the typical "duh" 15 year old tone here.)
"Eric, the basements flooded."
"I know, I just heard him." Goes down to basement, and returns to tell me that there is 5 inches of water and everything down there is a throwaway. During the first ten or so years of our marriage, I would have broken out in a cold sweat and started hyperventilating. Now, I immediately used my "been-married-to-this-exaggerator-man-long-enough-to-know-by-now-that-he-means-it-is-bad-but-not-end-of-the-world-bad deducer. I figured the 5 inches was probably 2, and the "everything down there is a throwaway" was some electrical equipment on the floor (unplugged!) and that some of his "man of the house" tools had gotten wet.
I went down. Okay, so there was some water that was maybe close to 5 inches in one of the corners. But the most of it was about 1 to 2 inches. Lots and lots and lots of wet laundry which now has to be washed and washed and washed.
We have a sump pump going right now and it should be clear pretty soon. Three of my kids left their laundry baskets on the floor, so now all their clean and folded clothes are wet. AAAAAAARRRRRGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH!
(This is our laundry system - I like it a lot. The washer and dryer are in the basement. We have a long couch nearby. It is really big. Then we have 6 laundry baskets. Each child has their own basket and it goes on the couch in order of age, oldest to youngest. As I do laundry (I mostly prefer to do it myself, although the kids do help when I ask), anything that only requires folding is folded and put into their basket. When the basket is full, they are supposed to take it to their bedroom and unpack it into their closets and drawers. I usually have to remind them. We also have another basket which holds socks. As they are washed they are just added to the basket, and whoever feels so inclined (usually Timothy, or I) will roll and fold the socks. Another basket is to carry things upstairs - like towels, table linens etc. Usually I just take mine and Eric's things up to our room as they are done. )
So, as I said, three of them left theirs on the floor. So now there will be extra laundry to hurry through.
And here I sit, writing a post..................? Okay.......back to work.
More later.

An update on my Parent's situation.

Some of you may know by now, and this may be news to others.
My parents are leaving the United States on Friday. January 13th to be precise. If you remember they were supposed to have left sometime in June 2005, but there have just been so many delays, one thing after another, and the one we all hoped for, but never actually thought would happen, was that they would be here for Christmas.
We are all devastated. One word to describe an indescribable amount of feelings. I kind of thought that maybe "something" else would come up, and not only would it be delayed again, but indefinitely. It seems this is "for real". They will pick up their paperwork tomorrow and meet with INS officials in Tukwilla on Friday afternoon. After that they will go to SeaTac and leave on a 6:30 pm flight to London.
I still can't believe this is happening. Tim and Jethro understand some of the legalities and politics behind this decision, but Katy and Brogan are bewildered - they cannot comprehend why their Pappa and Grandma have to leave.
I really couldn't imagine going to the airport, but my mom really wants me to go. So, actually we are all going. Please keep us in your thoughts and prayers.

I'm thinking about writing our story here, in regular installments. I have actually been working on it in book form for two years, but maybe this will be.................? Better? Quicker response? I don't know. Maybe I'll hear back from people who care. Or people with an actual opinion. Not that they would always necessarily agree with what I have to say, but it would be good to get "instant" feedback.
I'll see.

I'm Back

Well, truth be told, I never actually went away. I just got really busy for the last few months and put blogging at the bottom of my list...............
I'll try to not do that again.
I'm really motivated at the moment to leave at least one post here this week and hopefully next week as well. For a few reasons, really: (All of them worth writing about)
In no particular order, my older son has once again changed his hair - and yes, I was once again involved; I spoke once more with the delightful Mary Guterson - and for some reason, she asked me if I will be blogging about that "meeting"!; my sister-in-law, Sharon has been "bugging" me to add more reading material - she calls herself a "fan" - and who am I to deny her? How could I possibly resist her request, when she has never been anything other than totally fab to me? So, to be clear (because I have quite a few sister-in-laws - though no actual biological sisters, Oh, woe is me), Sharon is my husband's youngest brothers wife. Who, by the way, turned 36 today! Happy Birthday Gav, hope you have an excellent day and a narly year! Also..............Today is my youngest niece's first birthday! How about that? Happy Birthday sweet Brenna-girl. (PS: Honey-babe, we got the pic's your mama sent us - and I think you look just like me!)
And the other reason I decided to make time for blogging is because my mom also keeps bugging me. And, well............What can I say? She's my mom.
So.....................I'll be working on a new post, please check back soon!